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Porn

The culture of sexiness:

We are constantly fed images via pornography, ads, movies, CGI, fashion etc.
Women and/or lust are products or consumables.

I think girls have a super power--beauty.
And with great power comes great responsibility.

But I think guys are mostly to blame for sexual problems.
We need to get our heads out of our butts and respect our women.

I use Adblock or Adblock Plus to hide ads on my desktop computer.

feels so good:

This is a video for kids, but I learned a lot from it.
Prolly says something about my maturity level...

SPOILER ALERT!

Porn feels good, because God gave us a powerful sex drive.

"When somebody engages with pornography, there’s a 200 percent spike of dopamine to the reward centre of the brain – a region called the nucleus accumbens. That’s the same level of reward that you get from a morphine hit.

"When kids get this dopamine hit to the brain, their frontal lobe has not fully developed to be able to process that. That’s the part of your brain that is forward thinking – thinks about consequences, thinks about the future – and that doesn’t develop in boys until their early 20s. And so, when a 10-year-old is exposed to porn and gets that dopamine hit to the reward centre of the brain, he is not fully able to process it. That can potentially lead to a decade of addiction without the ability to really protect himself.

(from https://www.focusonthefamily.ca/content/porn-and-our-kids-what-parents-need-to-know )

We can't handle porn.

Porn addiction info here: https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/

Pornography addiction is a thing.
Pornography messes up your real sex life.

porn + masturbation = addiction

Design:

God made us and knows what's best for us. He is the manufacturer. We are the product. The Bible is the owner's manual.

Every product is designed for a specific use. There are commercial models and consumer models. If you don't follow the instructions, you'll ruin the product.

God designed us and knows what's good for us. He doesn't give us rules to keep us from having fun. He knows what we can handle. He knows our weaknesses. If I do whatever I want instead of following God, I'll wear out.

We are designed for monogamous relationships. Viewing one porn after another is the equivalent to your brain of having multiple sexual partners, and we can't handle it.

Respect:

What is the difference between porn and sex?

Porn = performance.
Consent is often missing in porn.
Female pleasure is misrepresented in porn.
Male dominance is common in porn.

"Today there is so much pressure for girls. Martin Daubney, who appears in our film, is the former editor of Loaded magazine in the UK and he now speaks in schools about pornography. He says that one of the big questions that guys in the classrooms are concerned about is What is legal? The biggest question for girls, on the other hand, is Do I have to have porn star sex in order to be popular?"

(from https://www.focusonthefamily.ca/content/porn-and-our-kids-what-parents-need-to-know )

Sex done right:

Please your partner.
Respect your partner.

Parents:

You are the first line of defense for your kids.

Talking to Your Kids About Pornography for Ages 8-11

Talk to someone who uses porn filtering software.

Movies, trailers, youtubes you're not familiar with:

http://www.kids-in-mind.com/

Each movie has a number like "2.5.1" indicating sex, violence and profanity.

I think it's unrealistic to expect abstinence from entertainment.
I think a better solution is alternative entertainment.

Here's what I watch:

http://www.chiptape.com/chiptape/video.htm

(Some of these are not kid-friendly)

Forbidden fruit:

When you tell a kid not to do something, he immediately wants to do it.

Is porn a bigger challenge for religious people?

The Law and Sin:

7 What then shall we say? That the law is sin? By no means! Yet if it had not been for the law, I would not have known sin. For I would not have known what it is to covet if the law had not said, "You shall not covet."8 But sin, seizing an opportunity through the commandment, produced in me all kinds of covetousness. For apart from the law, sin lies dead.9 I was once alive apart from the law, but when the commandment came, sin came alive and I died.10 The very commandment that promised life proved to be death to me.11 For sin, seizing an opportunity through the commandment, deceived me and through it killed me.12 So the law is holy, and the commandment is holy and righteous and good.

13 Did that which is good, then, bring death to me? By no means! It was sin, producing death in me through what is good, in order that sin might be shown to be sin, and through the commandment might become sinful beyond measure.14 For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am of the flesh, sold under sin.15 For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.16 Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good.17 So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.18 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing.20 Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.

21 So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand.22 For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being,23 but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members.24 Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?25 Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin.

(Romans 7:7-25)

Parental control software:

Can't parental control software just be hacked?

Yes.
They are not bullet-proof.
But they make it harder to find porn.

How Teens Bypass Parental Controls like OpenDNS
How your kids are beating your parental controls and is there anything you can do?
10 Easy Ways Kids Can Beat Internet Filters
Getting Around Your Internet Filter
Net Nanny... reinstall and change password

Does accountability software detect private-mode browsing?

I don't know.

How to filter texts, social media?

I don't know.

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mark@chiptape.com